Making Friends With Fear

Posted on January 28, 2011 | Comments Off

In one of my favorite quotes, Pema Chodron states, ”To be fully alive, fully human, and completely awake is to be continually thrown out of the nest.” As human beings, naturally we seek security. It’s certainly within me to want to feel secure, to build myself a sturdy nest and stay tucked away inside. But it is also true of human beings that we must grow and change, which sometimes means exposing ourselves to wide open terrain, rough, and uncharted. Sadly, most of us are not prepared to embrace the unknown. We’re not taught to work with our fear, to make it a friend, and seek its counsel. Yet, if we are to truly experience joy and the realization of our deepest longings we have to.

2011 is shaping up to be one of those years where I find myself walking into new territory in just about every aspect of my life. New possibilities for relationships, creativity, and work are emerging demanding that I make a choice.; either stay in the safe and secure nest that I’ve created for myself or set out into the unknown. I’m stepping out, but not without tools. One of things that I teach my coaching clients is about limiting beliefs. We are what we believe about ourselves and behind the heavy paralyzing feelings of fear that we experience are long held limiting beliefs that prevent us from stretching toward our dreams and passions. But we don’t have to be prisoners to our limiting beliefs. We can turn them around, replacing them with a more expansive belief that fits with our vision for who we want to be in the world. It may sound simple but for some people it can be extraordinarily difficult to let go of long held beliefs, particularly if they connect to traumas we’ve experienced and still hold in our bodies or core values that have been passed down to us from our families and communities. But while the work can be challenging it is not impossible and the benefits far out way any thing. Your fear can be a tool for your healing and transformation if you work with it instead fight against it. Time to jump out the nest and become fully alive and fully awake.

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Posted in Revelations

Why Meditate?

Posted on January 19, 2011 | Comments Off

Most mornings, at the start of my day I sit in meditation. It’s a practice that has been vital to my sense of center and wellbeing for the last six years. Recently, I’ve begun to struggle in my meditation practice. I find myself rushing out the door in the morning without sitting. My practice just doesn’t feel as essential as it once did. I struggle to nail down why this is important to me. To offer myself some fresh motivation I joined a group  of fellow meditators committed to completing ’28 Days of Meditation Practice’ together. I meditated consistently for 14 days and then fell off the wagon. Each day I had the vague intention to meditate but instead would find myself surfing the internet or watching movies until I fell asleep. But yesterday changed all of that. I was riding the subway after seeing several clients in the morning when I suddenly began to feel this panic churning up from my belly into my throat. I was absorbed with what I was doing, writing a to-do list for the day, that I at first didn’t even notice it. I was a familiar feeling. It’s the feeling that I get when I’m overwhelmed, what meditation has taught me is how to notice early before its moved through my entire body and when I notice to allow it to move through rather than repress it. As a mind-body healing practitioner I’m often working with people to support them in noticing their sensations and work with it to release those energetic blocks that prevent them from being the healthy, happy, and present individuals that they are capable of being. I came to this work seeking a solution to my own anxiety, first studying Reiki, then Generative Somatics, and eventually completing a certification in Empowerment Life Coaching. I know way to many healers who come to their practice with a commitment to self healing only to put themselves at the bottom of the priority list when sustaining their business requires more of them. In that moment on the train being revisited by old feelings of panic I remembered why meditation is essential to my life. I cannot help others if I do not prioritize my own well being. I meditate for presence, to keep my heart open, and to be well for myself and for those I help.

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Posted in Meditation

Sustaining A Creative Life

Posted on December 26, 2010 | 1 Comment

Recently, I’ve been thinking a lot about my creative process. My old creative habits just no longer suit me. When I was 19 years old and just discovering my love of writing and performance the process was all adrenaline and such intense focus that I could not be present with others until the work was done. It was an isolating and sometimes depressing way to be in the work. Then I discovered how valuable it is to be apart of a creative community and began to collaborate with other artists.  I also discovered that I loved to facilitate artistic projects with young people supporting them in producing plays giving voice to the issues that matter most to them. For a while I found myself unable to balance my own creative process with my commitment to creating in community. I either had to travel far away from home in order to write a new work, cutting myself off from my work as a teaching-artist and cultural worker or I’d put aside my writing leaving work unfinished for months and sometimes years because I simply could not carve out the time to write. It’s only now that I realize that I need to revisit my creative process, for the me that I am now; for the woman who is an artist, healer, coach, educator, and cultural worker. What are the practices that I must put into place to allow my fullest most creative self to be present with all that now matters to me, my family, friends, my work in community, and my artistic practice?

A few weeks ago I created a diagram that I think best represents what I need to be inspired. At the center was the word “Inspiration” arrows pointed out from inspiration at “Creating with Community ” because I am inspired by the work I created with others especially young people and women; “Spirit” because my spiritual practice is essential to my ability to be present and connected; “Creating In Solitude” because  yes sometimes an artist needs be alone with her musings; “Nature”, there is something that makes me feel fully alive and in the moment when in nature, “Studio time”, I need to just turn on a piece of music sometimes in an empty studio and just see what’s called forth from my body, sometimes the work comes through the body first then on to the page; “Seeing work”, as a performance artist I’m inspired by the movement and theatrical forms that other artists use and need to see as much work as possible, particularly during times when I’ve completed a project and need to replenish my own creative reserves. “Reading”anything and everything. “Classes” because I will always be on the path toward mastery as an artist, that learning never ends.; and something that just occurred to me now as I write this, fun. I need to have fun with the people I love to be inspired.

This formula may work for me today but as I evolve and grow so will the practices necessary to sustain my creativity. There is no one size fits all formula. Everyone needs something different. What’s the formula for sustaining your creative life?

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Posted in Art